Sometimes something needs to happen to push you out of neutral

Have you ever just been completely stuck in some random place in your life and you seriously have no idea what you’re going to do? 

It’s like the negatives and positives of all the options you have weigh the same and you have to actually make the decision. 

Because it’s not completely black and white on which option is best. 

This is me. All the time.

I don’t know if I was actually ever going to say anything. But nevertheless that option is gone now. 

I could have spoken up and said something, but thinking about it now the timing was perfect.

You see I wouldn’t have done anything to change where I was. I wouldn’t have made the decision to drop it or bring it up.

I would have just stayed, stuck in neutral.

So this is good I think. The whole thing being ripped off of the table. 

This way all things are left in tact and not made awkward by my words or lack thereof. 

This next step is going to be hard, but I think I’ve decided that it will be worth it. 

I’m not in neutral anymore. I think that’s what makes this okay. I think it’s what makes me okay. 

I guess this is the something I needed. The something I prayed for. To throw me out of neutral. 

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